Planning the wedding can be very overwhelming. I think we all know that. Getting help from friends and family is a wonderful and necessary thing. But, try not to lose track that it is your day. Not Mom’s, not your sister’s, not anyone’s but YOURS.  Don’t fall into the drama of pleasing everyone else.  It’s not worth it.

Enjoy the process. Take time to relax and realize you’re preparing for a fun wonderful day.  Sometimes there are gaps in generations that cause concern with certain traditions or ceremonies.  Grandma or Mom may not understand that “things have changed” since their wedding.  Do your best to educate them and help the understand rather than argue.  At the same time, maybe there are things that really are not that important and you can pay them respect by compromising to their vision.

Involve all those that want to help.  But keep in mind they are supposed to be supportive and in sync with your wishes.  I’ve seen it all over the years…. Mom’s choosing not to eat in order to save some for everyone else to arguments over silly little things.  Don’t take the stress or tension from the planning phase into your day.  Let it all go and allow your special day to be just that, special.

Wedding professionals love to help. Ask their opinion or ideas.  Maybe they can step in and be “the bad guy”.  They can tell your forceful helper “I’m sorry, that is not possible or available.” Or, “Well the bride has a great idea as well.”

As a photographer, I have often acted as a mediator in negotiations.  Some ideas are awesome and others…. well not so awesome.  That is ok.  You take both shots and then let them decide.  But at least the bride knows we got what she wanted.

Remember to thank those that are helping.  They are trying… well at least in their minds they are.  But seriously … a thank you can go a long way.  If they know you are grateful, then they are less likely to force things.

Overall, the experience is great and rewarding.  People bond, create memories and feel really good about all that is happening.  I only offer this little insight as a reminder that it’s your day.

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